How is a bathmat like the giant Goliath whom the future king David slew with a stone from his sling (1 Samuel 17)? A bathmat becomes like the Philistine warrior when it presents an opportunity to wisely choose which battle we’ll fight and which battle we’ll walk away from.

My battle of the bathmat taught me a good lesson one evening with what I’ll call The Bathmat Issue. What a silly thing I had been doing. I kept nagging my kids to put the bathmat back when they were done bathing so it could dry out. I would go in after them, pick it up, fuss at them and be irritated. In fact, after my yelling, everyone was irritated. One particular night, when I was picking up the bathmat, I had what could be called a “light bulb moment.”

Obviously the kids didn’t care about picking up the bathmat; it wasn’t a big deal to them. It was only important to me. Giving it more serious thought, harmony in my home was more important than how the mat made its way off the floor. God was pointing out to me in a gentle way what was really important. I decided to let go of The Bathmat Issue.

The apostle Paul advises us

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18). We are to “seek peace and pursue it.” (Psalm 34: 14)

So even when we find ourselves in a situation where we have to fight a “battle” for what we believe is right, a resolution of peace is the goal. It involves risk, but it will be worth it. Jesus says, “Blessed are the peacemakers” for good reason.

In addition to learning how to pursue a peaceful resolution, I’ve learned something else from the bathmat experience. There’s a difference between picking my battles and picking fights. When I go into “battle,” I don’t have to be a bully.

With an eyeful of wisdom, and sometimes the eye of a wise friend, I can see whether I’m just being selfish and my attitude needs adjustment. I’m still learning how to choose my battles and how to behave when fighting them. I ask questions like:

“Does it make a big difference one way or the other if things turn out my way?” “Am I making a mountain out of a molehill?” “Will my actions in fighting this battle harm someone or harm the relationship?”

In all cases, I try to be discerning.

David, who fought Goliath in the familiar story, recognized that the giant was wrong to mock the army of the Lord of hosts. Depending on God, David knew it was a battle he was meant to fight. On the other hand, I was upset about a soggy inanimate object.

In choosing my battles, I try to also remember that the key to all of them is prayer. Because that’s how important is the end result.