Riding It Out Together

Our group’s annual picnic was at a local state park one year and a couple of the young girls had been riding their bikes along the trails for a good part of the day. They invited me to come along. Having heard how challenging the trails could be, I wasn’t easily convinced.

But I went. They promised they’d watch out for me.

Taking the lead, the two youngsters were true to their word. As we biked our way up and down the hills, I’d hear them call out, “Bump!” “Curve coming up!” “Watch out for the loose sand!” Because they’d been down the trail so many times before, they were familiar with each hazard.

God gives us the gift of Christian friends to play the same role those girls played for me that day. Together, in faith, we can travel the road. But we need people who can help us when we encounter the bumps and curves.

I remember on that day at the park, the first thing those girls did was convince me with a promise to take care of me the best they could. Friends who help in our faith walk do the same. They pray for us, point us to God’s truth, rejoice with us when things go well and mourn with us during tough times.

In addition, we’ll meet people who have experiences and knowledge we don’t have who can warn us of possible hazards we wouldn’t see.

At one point during our trek that day, the girls decided we’d stop and rest. “It’s just a little further to the end,” they told me. It was a call to persevere. The ride was almost over. Likewise, as Christ followers, we’re encouraged to remain confident. We’ll be rewarded if we persevere and do the will of God. We’ll receive what God has promised.

So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. (Hebrews 10: 35,36)

By the end of my trip on the trails, I was tired. But when the girls asked me if I wanted to go again, I said, “Yes.” I had faith in the beginning that they would help me along the paths, and now I was more familiar with the way.

What was true that day at the park is true of sharing a spiritual journey with other disciples. If not for their encouragement, I might never go in the first place. If not for their help, I might fall many times on the way.

Claim Your Religion

“But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?” Matthew 16:15

Many Christians, members of the religious group to which I belong, have been trashing the word ‘religion’ for a long time. They shouldn’t, in my opinion, especially when referring to their own Church. A follower of Christ may be called upon to answer someday whether he or she claims this religion.

News sources all over the world openly reported countless incidents when this was true during 2014.

Taking a word for its literal meaning gives us one reason for accepting ‘religion’ into our vocabulary without prejudice. The basic definition my dictionary offers for the word and what most people, if pressed, understand it to mean is simple and direct.

“a personal set or institutional system of attitudes, beliefs and practices”

Our world is made up of people who practice a multitude of religions. Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Sikhs, Buddhists, Christians, Atheists, Confucians and more. For some reason, Christians have no problem with saying, for instance, “The Islamic religion.” They may even study a course in college comparing world religions.

But they don’t want to be called ‘religious’ themselves.

A Creed

Many Christians throughout the world regularly recite either the Nicene Creed or the Apostles’ Creed in their church services. Other creeds exist, but these two are most well-known. The Creeds are statements of faith. The words describe the belief system of a Christian. It’s important for a believer of any religion to know and understand his or her personal faith and remember that a creed isn’t synonymous with “rules.”

Followers of Christ tend these days to emphasize their relationship with God, and a relationship is important. We revel in the fact that we can call God our Father and that Jesus is not only our brother but our friend. However, doctrine–one’s belief system–is also important. Here are a couple of good reasons why.

Witness and Discipleship

Anyone hoping to share their faith with another must be able to communicate their beliefs. We can talk all day about our personal relationship with Jesus, but when the rubber meets the road, it comes down to “What do you believe in?” How can we help win someone to the faith without telling them who Jesus is and that he died to save them? Our core beliefs are the essence of the Gospel.Jesus Is ---

Christ himself had a conversation with a man named Nicodemus and witnessed to him with the words quoted in John 3:16-17, among others. Jesus told this Pharisee that he came to save the world. Christians today use these words of Christ more than any others to witness to people. I dare say there hasn’t been a professional football game played since the 1960s that hasn’t had some guy holding up a huge sign with that scripture. If those words were good for Jesus, they’re good enough for us. Nicodemus became a follower, after all.

Jesus talked about his relationship with his followers, but most of all, he said, “Believe in the Father; believe also in me.” Over and over again people Jesus encountered for healing were restored because of their faith. Their belief in who he is. Likewise, spiritual healing comes as a result of our belief. It means a lot to God and to his Son that we believe.

Our belief is what allows us into the relationship we talk about with such fervor.

Furthermore, we can’t help people in their walk with Christ (Jesus calls it making disciples) if we can’t speak about our own faith in Christ. It’s that simple. Again, we can talk all day about our relationship, but another Christ follower has to find his or her own way into that unique communion with the Lord.

What’s In a Word?

I understand when people say things like, “I’m not religious, I’m spiritual.” Or “Christianity isn’t about religion, it’s about relationship.” Or “Lose your religion.” They usually say those things because other Christians were sometimes less than helpful when they tried to enter the kingdom. The approach was hard, judgemental, or downright scary. So they blame ‘religion.’

If we’re honest with ourselves, we know it’s not ‘religion’ (by definition) that’s to blame; it’s people. Ever since Moses received the law from God, we’ve been guilty of misinterpreting and manipulating God’s word to suit ourselves. Then we want to make others follow those rules too. For people who do that now, as then, Jesus had fiery words.

“Woe to you, because you load people down with burdens they can hardly carry, and you yourselves will not lift one finger to help them” (Luke 11:46).

I speak from personal experience that it’s still true. It was part of my upbringing and I’ve had some ‘spiritual’ folks bang me over the head with their ‘spirituality’. In fact, I confess that at one time, I too was a spiritual bully.

Still…

As I said, any believer of any religion may one day be asked to give answers about what they believe.

We Americans often think we’re being persecuted if the government, our bosses or some organization take actions we disagree with. We can be more vocal about what we are against than what we’re for. Many of us take issue with the smallest slights, when Christians in foreign lands are truly suffering because of their beliefs. These people don’t pass under our daily radar. If ever. Maybe when there’s something in the news. I don’t speak about all Christians, because many are really trying to make a difference.

But what’s inspiring is that those truly persecuted Christians consider it a privilege to “claim their religion.” So that’s what they do.

In most of these countries true persecution begins when a Christian claims his or her religion. At baptism–the public statement of belief–that person will become estranged or ostracized from the family and the community. If that country is in the very least accepting of Christianity, believers may worship according to the government’s standards. If there’s no tolerance at all, those Christians worship in secret.

Many times they don’t have it that good. Their lives are at risk. The opposition to Christianity in those countries won’t ask, “Do you have a relationship with Jesus?” They’ll ask something more like, “Do you believe in this Jesus?” “Are you a Christian?”

Not a friendly environment.

Name It, Claim It

We don’t need to be afraid of the word religion in referring to Christianity. Knowing the security we have in our relationship with God will encourage us to boldly claim our religion instead of “losing” it.

Talk about your relationship with God. It’s okay because that relationship is what sets us apart from other religions. But spreading the Gospel message begins with doing what Jesus did: preaching the good news of the kingdom. The Good News starts with talking about Jesus. Tell people what he did and why he did it. Tell them about some of those beliefs in your creed. He rose again as he said he would. He’s coming back to claim his own.

If you can get that message across, you may have helped win someone over just as the Spirit led you.

Why Me?

“What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?” Psalm 8:4

Dear God:
Why did you place me in a family with parents who, though imperfect, were devoted to one another for forty-seven years until death separated them?
Why did you give me a childhood in which I regularly ate three meals a day, had pure water to drink, a safe neighborhood to play in and clean clothes to wear? And God, why did you show your tender love to me through the example of one Sunday school teacher?

Why me, God?

When I walked away from you, why didn’t you walk away from me?
Then when I went away to college and my intellect became my god, why were you so patient?
Why did you give me two children who love and trust me even though I’ve failed them so many times?
Why did you spare my life when my foolishness or despair brought me so close to death?

Why me, God?

And why, after years of living my sinful lifestyle, did you welcome me back to the fold?
Why are you keeping all your promises to me?
Why do I have a roof over my head? Why do I get to walk with two feet, see with two eyes and hear with two ears?

Why do I have friends who stand by me?
When my pain is such a burden I can’t bear it, why do you take it onto yourself?
Why, when I’m so imperfect, do you allow me to serve this world in your name?

Why me?

And why, oh why, God, when I was still an object of your wrath, did you die for me?

Oh, why, why me?

“For God so loved the world…” John 3:16

 

Seeking The Savior

Is Christmas still “the most wonderful time of the year”? Christmas, for those who celebrate it, is probably the time most filled with traditions.

We bake cookies, peanut brittle and fudge. We get crafty and make tree ornaments, stockings and wreaths. We decorate the tree with a new theme. Some of us even mail Christmas cards.

We might even call shopping a tradition. I know people who make a day of shopping one of their special times for family fellowship. Friends will meet to tramp the mall and have a “cup of good cheer.”

Do you remember the traditions of your childhood? Maybe childhood isn’t so long ago for you. For others of us childhood is decades ago. What do you remember as your favorite tradition?

My youth at Christmas time included some great expectations. We knew there would be a Christmas program at our church and the kids in our family who were old enough would have a part. There was even a tradition associated with the program. At the end, when we were all released, each child was given a small paper bag filled with candy and nuts. The contents were predictable—it was a tradition after all—but we squealed with delight all the same.

When I think of reciting a poem in front of our small congregation (almost without a hitch), my hands shaking, then receiving my treat later, I still get nostalgic. Our program, like that of most churches, revolved around a nativity scene and the story of Christ’s birth from the second chapter of Luke. We also included arrival of the Magi bringing gifts.

I didn’t need a song to tell me Christmas was the most wonderful time of the year. My family seemed to come together like at no other time. And we had our own traditions.

The Christmas tree was one of our favorites. I come from a large family and decorating must have seemed a little chaotic for my mom, but she let us go full force with the job. The only things we weren’t allowed to touch were the vintage (even then) glass ornaments. My older brother most enjoyed flinging icicles at the tree, which by no means would ever have been artificial. Not in those days.

We did other things to prepare for Christmas, but my absolute favorite tradition was driving around our small town looking at the variety of light displays families used to decorate their homes. Usually, the night of the Christmas program was our special night to make the journey.

In the days before tiny lights with built-in gadgets to make them twinkle (to recorded music, no less) and huge air-filled snowmen and Santas, people kept their decorating modest for the most part. Or at least tasteful. Even families who could afford to decorate with more lights, steered away from the “Christmas Vacation” style of decorating.

I guess we were old fashioned. Christmas meant more than showing off.

Since it was a small town, it didn’t take us long to drive around and see the lights. Short drive though it was, we regarded it as a real treat. Like I said, our family would come together like no other time. We children “oohed” and “aahed” as if we were at a fireworks display. Sometimes Dad would roll to a stop at a house if its decorations needed a little longer to take in.

The display I regarded as most special decorated the lawn in front of the church on main street. There, year after year, we’d roll to a stop to admire the nativity scene. Two small floodlights in the ground shone upward, making it easy to see Joseph, Mary and Jesus at night. We counted off each character, especially baby Jesus, whose story we’d just enacted.

For us, that stop on main street was like the magi looking for the holy family.

This year, I’ll be spending Christmas with my family again. A sister, my children and grandchildren. When my sister and I reach our hometown, we’ll drive down Lincoln Avenue and surely, I’ll be on the lookout for houses with pretty decorations. They indicate to me that people still enjoy that tradition.

But mostly, I’ll keep my eye out for the church and its classic nativity scene. As I’ve done for years, I’ll be seeking the Savior.

Gratitude Breeds Contentment

Oy! My body aches. I had surgery six days ago and have two incisions in my back. Swelling in my feet and legs has stretched the skin so badly I can’t wiggle my toes without pain. Because of the pain associated with the incisions, sometimes I tense up. Then my shoulder and back muscles ache.

Not only that, but when I sit in my chair, I must take a deep breath and slowly lean back until I’m in the right position. Then, because I’m now monitoring my blood pressure every day, I must take some deep belly breaths and relax before I push the button on the cuff. It all hurts.

But–

The surgery I had has proven already to be a success. I know the incisions will eventually heal and won’t hurt anymore. I have medicine now to relieve the swelling in my lower limbs. I’m beginning to relax more when I move to avoid aggravating the site of the staples and stitches.

I can breathe. I’m able to cook for myself. I can climb the few stairs to get mail from the mailbox. I don’t need help getting dressed or bathing.

I’m grateful for those things that I might often take for granted.

During November I’ve been posting each day on Facebook and Twitter something for which I’m thankful. It would be easy to say I’m grateful for that parking space I got close to the grocery store yesterday. I could say I’m glad I have a good book to curl up with. The list of simple things like that could go on and on. I am grateful for those things.

However, I’m trying to post things I’m grateful for that are true promises of God or things which I know come from the truth of scripture. In fact, I’ve been including scripture in each post or tweet.

This time of year, people are thinking about Thanksgiving (yes, Christmas already too) and they’ll be more apt to look at a gratitude list. My practice is to include thankfulness in every day. At the top of my daily To Do list the words “Be Grateful” appear in a thick blue line written with a Sharpie.

Every good and perfect gift comes from God. (James 1:17) My breath, my healing, the ability to dress and cook for myself are only because God provides. I also know the pain and inconvenience I’ve experienced are allowed by him.

Knowing this, I’ve learned to be more content over the years. Of course, I don’t like pain and inconvenience. But nothing that happens to me is a surprise to him. He uses it to perfect me. How could I not be grateful, knowing this?

My prayer for you is a Thanksgiving Day spent in a way that you see all the goodness in your life. Praise God for it. Then look at the trials and inconveniences and praise God for those too. You know why. (James 1:2-4) Because through them you’ll realize you’re growing. One hopes to also be more content each day.

Be grateful for a good meal, friends and family if you celebrate with them, a warm home to live in and, most of all, for every promise God has made to you.

Mom Was Mission Minded

Prior to the estate sale, Dad told each of his eight children to select one thing we wanted. He’d also selected one thing for us that he wanted us to have. The rest was up for auction.

My “one thing” was my Mother’s entire written materials. I had no idea what would be in that package, but I remembered Mom writing, always writing.

The package contained calendar type diaries, notes from stories she wanted to write and letters from our distant cousin, Mr. Lehman. This cousin’s letters offered a great deal about past generations and members of the family still alive. I remember Mom finding encouragement from the stories of relatives who emigrated from Germany. These were missionaries who’d been persecuted for their faith. He’d even been able to find their name, Christophel, which means “Christ carrier.”

Mom had a mission mindset and it was in her thick three-ring binder full of poetry where I discovered how serious missions was to her. There I found evidence that she’d hoped God would send she and Dad somewhere faraway to work as missionaries.

It wasn’t to be. God’s plan for her was to spread the gospel closer to home. As I remember it, and as the evidence shows, that’s what she did.

While I was growing up, my friends would come over to play and of course, she’d bring up her favorite topic: Jesus. Asking my friends if they were saved came as naturally to her as doling out cookies. She’d talk about the importance of having a relationship with Him. As long as they wanted the treats, she had a captive audience.

Once outside, my friends chided me. I was embarrassed, but I shouldn’t have been. After all, they were my friends. If I cared about them, I should have been telling them about Jesus.

Mom had opportunities to make an impact on children in other ways too. She always taught Sunday school; all grade levels. In the box of papers I also found a summer camp brochure where she’d been a counselor for a week.

As well as being a homemaker, Mom chose nursing as a career. She worked until she was diagnosed with multiple myeloma when my youngest siblings (twins) were almost two years old. I still lived in my hometown at that time and it wasn’t unusual for someone to approach me and reminisce about my mother’s bedside manner.

They’d say things like, “You know, when I was in the hospital, your mother was the best nurse I had.” These comments pleased me, but didn’t surprise me. She loved taking care of people. That was another way God chose to use her and though people never said so, I’m guessing Mom prayed with a few of her patients. She was a prayer warrior. Her favorite phrase was “Prayer changes things.”

It’s impossible to tell how many lives Mom touched as a “Christ-carrier.” Most of the clues came from observing her over the years and then making discoveries in that packet containing her papers and journals.

She kept track of her witnessing efforts with one person in particular–her oncologist. Notes made in the margins of her cancer journal revealed that she had witnessed to him and given him a “smiley face tract.” I suppose it was a last ditch effort to plant some seeds, because Mom had decided to stop having treatments.

While at a party a couple years ago, I was introduced to a woman who had known my mother. “What a striking resemblance,” she said. “And when I saw you go across the room just a few minutes ago, I noticed you even walk like her.”

I laughed at that. But thinking of it now, I realize my spiritual walk isn’t much like hers. I get a little hard of hearing when it comes to heeding the Lord’s instructions for me.

Not Mom; she heard the call of God on her life and got in step with the Holy Spirit immediately. Though her desire was to travel to distant lands, she was satisfied with a small town and the people God placed in her path. She focused on what mattered and wasn’t ashamed of the gospel.

I can hear the Savior saying to her, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Facing Adversity

The journey of spiritual maturity isn’t always easy. From the first tentative steps we take as Christ followers, we experience hard times. Adversity comes to everyone, not just those who live in obedience to the sinful nature.

Yet with our eyes focused on Jesus, adversity doesn’t have the power over us it once had. If we’re living in his presence and listening for his voice, we understand more about who Christ is and we grow deeper in our relationship with him.

As we stay in step with the Holy Spirit, we experience less of the troubles we once made for ourselves. However, when those inevitable times of adversity come, we’re promised that they’re only for a specified time, which God has already ordained.

We also know that God is present in any circumstance, good or bad, and provides the resources we need to get through. The resource may come in the form of another person’s assistance, finances, a specific need for our health, or the prayers of the saints.

When hard times come and put us to the test, God always does his part; what is expected of us? In my experience, relying on God and deepening my conscious contact with him brings peace. Rather than running full-tilt to try and solve a problem, he’s shown me it’s better if I slow down. That doesn’t mean doing nothing. It means I slow down enough to hear what he has to say to me.

“I tell the Lord my troubles and difficulties, and wait for Him to give me
the answers to them,” said one man of God. “And it is wonderful how a
matter that looked very dark will in prayer become clear as crystal by the
help of God’s Spirit.” I think Christians fail so often to get answers to their
prayers because they do not wait long enough on God. They just drop down
and say a few words, and then jump up and forget it and expect God to answer them.
Such praying always reminds me of the small boy ringing his neighbor’s doorbell,
and then running away as fast as he can go. ~ E.M. Bounds

Scripture says we can rely on the power of God to help us through times of adversity. “We are struck down, but not destroyed.”

Jesus warned that in this world we would have trouble, then assured his disciples that he himself had overcome the world (John 16:33).

Following the Master means denying ourselves, which is to die to our rights; carrying our cross, which is to die to our old nature; and to follow, which is obedience.

What does that mean for us? Trials are bound to come in life even with our new life in Christ. But with the power of God working through us, we can overcome any situation and live the abundant life promised to us.

Without God, we’re helpless; but with him all things are possible

Fleshing Out a Flannelgraph

“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are–yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”

When I was a child going to Sunday school in the basement of my church they used “flannel graphs” to tell Bible stories. A flannel graph consisted of a flannel-covered board on an easel and cloth Bible characters. The characters stuck to the flannel as you placed them then peeled them while telling the story. There was Joseph and his brothers; Noah, the ark and the animals; and of course, Jesus.

The stories I heard about Jesus in Sunday school always made him sound larger than life. He worked miracles healing people and made a little bit of food go around to feed a multitude. He was a pretty awesome Jesus.

Then I’d go upstairs to big church and the pastor’s message about Jesus was that he died on a cross for me. That kept Jesus in the larger than life realm. Not knowing exactly what a crucifixion entailed, I assumed it was pretty bad and that I was lucky Jesus would do such a thing for me. The pastor talked about how angry God was about sin and how much I needed his forgiveness. He was a pretty awesome God too, but for different reasons. I made a decision to ask God to forgive me and asked Jesus to come into my heart.

God and Jesus fell into the larger than life category for a long time. And there’s nothing wrong with that; they are larger than life. But something was missing and it kept me from really knowing how much I could benefit from the decision I’d made about Jesus. I didn’t know it then, but what I was missing was Jesus with flesh on.

Skip ahead several years. I had become confused and disillusioned by church, leaving it to try my own way of living. I still believed in God, but he wasn’t part of my worldview. Then something happened to create in me a hunger for him and I returned to the church. Because I was hungry for God, I began to read my Bible. In fact, I devoured it. Guess what I found?

I found a Jesus with flesh on.

I don’t remember the folks in the church where I grew up talking about Jesus as a man. They must have, but I was young and mostly listening to the anger part. I never really got a glimpse of Jesus with flesh on until I read about him for myself. As I traveled through Galilee and the Judean countryside with him and his followers I watched him interact with people like a real person would. I saw him express emotions like anger, joy, and grief.

He got tired and slept. He got hungry and ate. He ate with friends and with some Pharisees (who weren’t always counted among the friendly). He worshiped on the Sabbath. He engaged in normal human activities found easily if you look in scripture.

Maybe it’s the storyteller in me that looks for what’s hidden. I look at more than just the words and read between the lines. For starters, he was a carpenter. Imagine Jesus banging his finger with a hammer and getting one of those black fingernails. We know he had sisters and brothers and though we aren’t told much about his childhood, it must have been a fairly normal one with playtime, chores, and “school”.

Then his ministry began. Look at the loaves and fishes story. After Jesus multiplied the food for the crowds, he sent his disciples on to Bethsaida “while he dismissed the crowd.” (Mark 6:45) Call me goofy, but I see Jesus talking to people as they leave as if he knows them personally. It’s not a “Hey, all of you, clear out of here now” type of dismissal. It’s the type of thing a host would do, saying goodbye to as many as possible and seeing that their needs are met. Anyway, that’s the Jesus I was getting to know.

I got to know a Jesus who was a single man all his life while many his age would have been betrothed or already married. Jesus lost a relative, John the Baptist, to a cruel death and took time to grieve alone before he was called again to minister to the crowds. Jesus’ closest relatives misunderstood him to the point that they tried to manipulate his actions, thinking they knew better what he should do. At a crucial moment, his best friends deserted him. One of his friends committed suicide.

After becoming familiar with this Jesus, I realized I need the God who’s larger than life and truly awesome. But I also need this Jesus that has been human and can understand what it’s like to be me. Many of us have no mate, have grieved the loss of a close relative, are genuinely misunderstood, and have been deserted by a friend.

Jesus with flesh on makes him able to relate to us in every problem and in every success. God wants to get up close and personal. He wants us to know he’s not just a flat personality we peel and stick to our circumstances when we need him. He’s a fleshed out God who relates to every situation in which we find ourselves. And his desire is that we’ll get to know him as that pretty awesome Jesus.

Finding God in the Picture

While visiting my hometown several years ago my sisters and I decided to take a walk through downtown. An acquaintance who was also out walking met up with us at a corner of town. She asked if I’d be attending the funeral of a high school friend. I was shocked. I told her I had no idea my friend had passed.

The next day, as I walked away from my seat at the graveside, my friend’s sister rushed up to me and hugged me tightly. “I knew you’d be here,” she said. Strange; I hadn’t planned on attending a funeral when I left home to go visiting. But apparently God was working in the background and had planned it for me.

I’ve come to believe God has a way of finding us and taking us where we belong.

Several times in my journey with God, he reminds me how important it is to acknowledge him in the circumstances of my life. For me, it’s been a process of knowing his ways (as well as a small person can know the ways of a sovereign God) and recognizing his voice when he’s speaking.

Back when God orchestrated the events that took me to my friend’s funeral, I just shook it off; I didn’t think twice about how it happened. Now, I see a little more clearly how he works. It’s no coincidence that I happened to be out walking and saw that particular person. It was no coincidence that she was the older sister of my best friend from high school who had passed away a couple years earlier.

Sandy, my best friend, and this woman who was also now gone from our lives, had been part of a foursome of teens that was almost inseparable. As much as my friend’s sister needed me to be there for her, I needed to be present for my own sake.

God in his sovereignty cares for and works out all aspects of my life even if I don’t see that work immediately. He may be working in the background and through unlikely people.

Events happen in my life that tempt me to question God. But I know better than to do that. Even during those times, because I’m his child, I’ve learned from experience he is always as close to me as he’ll ever be.

I’m reminded of the book of Esther. God’s name is never mentioned, but his presence is certainly there in the citadel of Susa. If we know what to look for and if we’re really looking, we can’t miss him. He’s guiding, providing for and protecting his beloved people. The young Jewish woman who was born Hadassah, became queen and influenced the king in a way perhaps no one else could.

One might say the book of Esther is a story of God finding a young Jewish maiden and taking her where she belonged.